Ariana LongsonUpdated on: October 12, 2024 7:33 pm GMT
Almost two years after the tragic death of her brother, actress Hayden Panettiere is opening up about her journey of healing. In a recent interview with People magazine, she shared her heart-wrenching emotions following the unexpected passing of Jansen Panettiere, who died of cardiomegaly and complications from aortic valve disease in early 2023. To Hayden, the loss felt like “losing half of my soul,” and the pain of that moment continues to resonate deeply.
Grieving a Sibling’s Loss
Hayden Panettiere, known for her roles in shows like “Heroes” and “Nashville,” revealed that coping with her brother’s death has been an ongoing struggle. “He was my only sibling, and it was my job to protect him,” she said, expressing her profound sense of responsibility and grief. The emotional toll has been significant, as she candidly admitted, “I will always be heartbroken about it…I will never get over it.”
The shock of Jansen’s sudden passing not only impacted her emotionally but also physically. After his death, Hayden experienced drastic changes in her body, gaining 40 pounds due to stress. “I just ballooned out,” she explained. She also faced challenges that stemmed from agoraphobia, a condition she had battled in the past. “I didn’t feel confident to put on clothes and get out of the house…What I was experiencing was my body protecting itself,” she reflected.
Finding Strength Through Exercise
Amid her grieving process, Hayden sought help and found solace through physical fitness. Last year, her publicist connected her with Marnie Alton, a personal trainer and CEO of M/BODY, who not only assisted her in regaining her fitness but also became a supportive friend. “She empowered me,” Hayden said about Alton, noting that their time together was more than just workouts; it was a form of therapy.
They would often go on “long, beautiful walks,” which provided Hayden with an opportunity to vent and heal simultaneously. “My body just started reacting, not just from working out. It allowed me to release the stress, the high expectations I’d always put on myself,” she stated, underscoring the importance of mental well-being alongside physical health.
The Impact of Change
The transformation has been profound, as Hayden shared how her new lifestyle has positively affected her mental state. “There’s nothing like looking in the mirror and feeling like you look good enough to walk out the door,” she said. Alton commended Hayden for her courage and willingness to confront her challenges openly.
- Key Points to Healing:
– Support from a personal trainer and mentor
– Engaging in regular physical activity
– Venting through conversations during workouts
– Gaining confidence in one’s appearance
Looking to the Future
Now, nearly two years since Jansen’s death, Hayden feels a renewed sense of self. “I’m starting to feel like myself again,” she noted, expressing a sense of contentment. A significant part of her focus is on her daughter, Kaya, who demonstrates a variety of skills at a young age. “She golfs, she plays chess. She’s been dancing since she was little and loves singing,” Hayden proudly said.
In addition to her dedication to motherhood, the actress is working on an autobiography that promises to offer an intimate look at her life. “It will showcase the real me, from my perspective,” she revealed, indicating her desire to share her experiences with fans and perhaps help others dealing with similar issues of loss and recovery.
Keeping Memories Alive
Though she misses her brother immensely, Hayden believes he will always be with her in spirit. “He will always be beside me,” she stated, emphasizing the lasting bond they shared. This perspective seems to be a cornerstone of her healing journey, serving as a reminder of love and connection beyond loss.
Hayden Panettiere’s story shows how tough it can be to deal with grief and how important it is to have support when times are hard. As she learns to live without her brother, her journey inspires many people. It reminds us that even when we feel very sad, there is still hope for healing and starting anew.
